Guess what I just did :)

Well, I’ve really gone and done it this time 🙂 In my frustration at myself for feeling like a failure for achieving virtually nothing with my writing for three years (apart from keeping my toe in with Social Media groups and writing blogs, memoir & poetry), I’ve signed up for Uni!!
Those who know me and who have been following my blog will not be surprised at all since I’ve been floundering with my writing for what seems like an eternity, have been at an impasse and entirely unsure about which direction to take… I’ve had to accept that as far as book writing is concerned, I’m at the other end of the tunnel now.

It’s time, overdue actually, for me to start thinking about learning new skills to take my writing to another level so I’ve signed up to a University course that will allow me to do that. Finally, I feel like I’ve made a big decision – the right decision – that will take my life in an entirely new direction and hopefully there will be a pay cheque at the end of it 🙂

Now that my schedule has emptied out – my grandson is at school and my son no longer needs me to transport him to his course during the week and now only have one child living at home – I actually have time to think about what I want for a career and how to make that happen. Already I feel as if I have elevated myself to a different place and am feeling so much more happy & positive about my life. The thing is, I’ve been wanting to go back to school for 30 years!! Yes, that’s right, that’s a long time to be waiting to live one of your dreams and now is MY TIME 🙂

 I’m so ready for a change. Wish me luck 🙂

Peace & love,

Linda M Malcolm

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Grrrr, after waiting all of this time –

Not happy Janet: I’ve waited nine long months and been very patient when my website crashed and burned last year only to find that now that it’s back up and running, there’s stuff everywhere and all of my carefully chosen pictures have disappeared! Where do I even start to fix this?

Later: okay, my tech support girl has said I use too many pictures and that they’re too big and that’s why my website crashed so I’ve tried to change things as much as I can. Some of the posts are still missing pics but I guess that doesn’t matter. I have deleted seven pages as they were just drivel that made me feel like I was losing my mind when I was reading them 🙂 Hopefully my poetry has improved somewhat since then. This website still needs a lot of work so bear with me. If there are any handy hints you can give me I would be very grateful. Cheers.

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My Magnum Opus:

Is it? Is my work going to live? I wanted to be a writer, that’s all, I wanted to write about it all – everything that happens in a moment – the way the flowers look when you carry them in your arms, how it smells, how it feels. All of our feelings – yours and mine – the history of it, who we once were, everything in the world, all mixed up, it’s all mixed up and how we want it all and . . . I failed!”

Virginia Woolf – The Hours (Mrs Dalloway)

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From the very core of my being, as a writer,  I can relate to this sentiment wholeheartedly. How we make ourselves busy, going about our lives thinking we’re doing very important things and how one day, any day now, the masterpiece will get written and everything will slot into place like a jigsaw puzzle.  But … then the realisation. This is my very important thing. This is my Magnum Opus. My wildest dreams came true the day I birthed my children into this world (and as I stood there outside the door anxiously waiting for my grandson to be birthed). This is my true calling and vocation and today is the day that my life changes forever 🙂

collagefam345ty collage tome

Do you ever feel like …

… people are pushing you to your limit, constantly trying to squash your power or criticise you and set you up behind your back? It’s because you need to develop a fighting spirit: there’s no point being in a boxing ring if you’re too afraid to throw a punch. And I’m not talking about physical violence either, I’m talking about life.

(or it’s an alien species from another planet messing with your head – one or the other) 🙂

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Everything I know about writing practise…

I learnt from my mother: nothing, absolutely nothing stopped her. Not husbands coming and going, poverty, sickness, a house full of children, friends & relatives dropping off the perch all around her. The show must go on … she said 🙂 Thanks mum!

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Journal entry:

My children and I weren’t born with silver spoons in our mouths: quite often we were alone together and their fathers were absent for whatever reason. There were no hands-on grandparents to help out, no high-flying career to bail us out of tough financial times. But you know what? You don’t get strong by swimming downstream without a current. The outcome of all of that is that there is an unbreakable bond between us and my children’s ability to endure and apply themselves to hard work and tough circumstances takes my breath away 🙂

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Sunshine on a cloudy day:

I knew you before I read your words,

I sensed your spirit and spoke with you,

Before ever I saw your name,

And there you were shining like a ray of sunshine,

“Don’t get too carried away, though” I told myself,

“Life is still life, after all,”

This dark night of the soul has me drowning in plasma,

The scream from my soul piercing,

The eardrums of the Angels above Earth,

And I’m numb – so grotesquely numb,

. . . and there you were.

girl0954

 

 

Internet Lovers III

He called her his “Little Nut,”

Because every mighty oak,

Started out as a lil’ nut that just wouldn’t quit 🙂

So she spends her days waiting for him,

To wake up on the other side of the pond.

 

Her 3am became the breaking of the fast.

He was like lightning in a bottle,

On that screen,

And she had to drink it,

Had to feel it coursing through her veins.

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Friends for life:

There will come a day,

When all of those people who were there for you,

Have gone – fallen by the wayside,

And that’s when you have to make do with you

And just hope like hell that you’re someone who you can tolerate,

Because it’s a long, insufferable life if you don’t like the company of you.

Bathe yourself in self-love, wrap yourself in barbed wire,

Place yourself at the uppermost part of the ivory tower,

And then take your key and unlock your imagination because it will be your companion for life.

girl and lost hatawa kyty3oba